The voice inside...

Over the past 

six months I have been 

questioning my every turn. 

Last fall, I 

made the decision to move out

of my home that I had lived in

for four years. 

I decided to remove myself

away from a person

who I had a 

relationship with, but

for some reason

it ceased to be functional, healthy,

and happy. 

Since I have moved out on my own, 

I have made attempts at communication, 

amending past hurts, and most

of all admitting

that I was as much at fault too. 

Sometimes though, 

apologies can't undo the

damage two people

have caused to each other. 

Last night tears just constantly leaked

out of my eyes as I tried to fall asleep. 

I have had worse

moments of self doubt, 

but last night at 

the time it felt like I was

screwing up my life in the 

worst way I ever had. 

Eventually 

I came to realize

that this isn't a mistake. 

I couldn't tell why, but the gut

feeling I had was

that no matter what 

I would be happy. 

My life would be good.  

I am making

a choice to 

be on my own. 

It's what is needed. 

I can't explain it... it's the same gut feeling

I get at work when I sense a patient is going to crash, or when

I can tell someone is yanking my chain,

or like when my dad died and that day I woke up feeling not quite right.

 So I fell asleep finally. And today I woke up and read my 

book of Shel Silverstein poems. 

I cracked a huge smile when I re-read 'The Voice Inside', 

which is one of my favorites and I look at often. 

If I listen to the voice inside, keep my faith,

and stay grounded I know that

everything will 

be 

just

fine.